Since my childhood, i felt that i am simply not for this world. I do not belong here.
I have an incurable disease, of homesickness for stars, beyond this universe.
I don’t understand why people fight with each other, trying to gain the upper hand in every single possible opportunity. I do not understand, even if i do my best i am still not enough for others. I am trying to do better, trying to achieve the dreams once i had. Even though i achieved some of them this year, like moving into my own house, getting a dog and working in a job, i didn’t feel a single thing of accomplishment or happiness.
I am like a husk of my former self living through the memories of past.
The only thing i feel is the bitter cold of something, something that i cant understand.
When i was a child, i sometimes felt weird bitter and emptiness in my chest for a short time for no reason.
Today, i realize that feeling seized me, silently and i have been trying to live with it.
Even after all this,
I will keep moving forward.
Yomitatsu 